‘Tis The Season: Authors Talk Holidays is a special seasonal feature on Pop! Goes The Reader in which some of my favourite authors help me to celebrate the spirit of the season and spread a little holiday cheer. So, pour yourself a cup of hot chocolate and snuggle in by the fireside as they answer the question: “What does the holiday season mean to you?”
About Ashia Monet
Ashia Monet is a speculative fiction author based in Philadelphia. Her work centers LGBTQ+ people of color and ranges from teenage magicians on epic road trips to 19th century gothic horror characters hunting Dracula. Her young adult debut novel, The Black Veins, is available now.
A Recipe for The Perfect Gift
Gift giving is one of my love languages. I love choosing the perfect item to surprise a loved one. Unfortunately, this has effectively turned Christmas into an annual twenty-four-day race to discover the absolute perfect item to surprise friends and family. Never one to back down from a challenge, I have developed not just a perfect recipe — no, no, no. It is the perfect recipe to quell said gift-giving anxiety and provide any shopper with a tried-and-true method for securing the perfect gift. In fact, I can confidently say that that this recipe is foolproof.
Ingredients
Three cups of patience, four cups of creativity, 2/3rds memory (Did you already get them that last year? Do they already own six of those?), and a sprinkle of Christmas cheer (if you don’t have Christmas cheer, you can substitute with determination and a will of iron). Add salt to taste.
Estimated Time
Usually? Up until the final minute on Christmas Eve, especially if you can’t think of anything to get them, or if life takes over, and then you blink and it’s the 24th. Good luck.
Level of Recipe Difficulty
Haha.
*Recipe Note: You don’t always need a large budget, which I discovered during years when funds were very low. When your budget fails, don’t worry — your creativity is free. (I’m a broke college student who once gave away an army of origami cranes because the season snuck up on me. At least people seemed to enjoy them.)
Step One
Forget Christmastime exists until your roommates decorate the apartment, snow is barreling down outside, your family keeps calling you for some reason and finals are coming and oh crap it’s Christmas?
Step Two
Time to shop! On a usual year, this means driving to the nearest malls and shops as they blast the same ten Christmas songs, ones that you know by heart and would honestly feel somewhat cheated if you didn’t hear. Mariah Carey wants you for Christmas. On the third time of hearing it, it starts to feel somewhat ominous. This is normal.
Step Three?
Every store is having a sale, and at this point you will probably start buying one gift for someone else and one gift for yourself. You are not supposed to be buying things for yourself, so you agree to keep this step, step three, to yourself. In fact, step three never happened. Better yet —
Step “Three”
Become a nomad of the internet. When shopping in stores fail, you can always turn to online shopping, which is often, equally frustrating and confusing. How long are shipping times? Which of these coupon codes actually works? Which websites are you forgetting to check? Have shipping costs always been that expensive?
Step Four
The time has arrived. After weeks of searching, of ordering, of wrecking your brain, hoping the items arrive on time, begging to every god you can think of in the hopes that you really haven’t gotten them this gift twice because you truly cannot remember, you wrap the gift as best you can and present it to your loved one.
Step Five
Experience the joy of giving. Don’t skip this step — no, seriously. It’s the best part of the whole recipe. Because, yes, sometimes the gift is a dud, but it’s funny because you’ll never live it down. Sometimes you do choose a good gift, and you’ll see them wearing that sweater for years to come. Sometimes it falls in the middle: they never speak of it again and neither do you. Stalemate, try again next year.
To me, the holidays is a whirlwind of adventuring around, succumbing to consumerism and kneeling at capitalism’s feet, only to ultimately realize that the whole affair is rather silly. Your loved ones love you, and you love them, and that’s really all that matters. Also, it’s Jesus’s birthday and you didn’t get him a gift, so I suppose the gift giving nonsense is really just capitalism at it again.
This recipe is foolproof. Because, as I have found, it is rarely what is inside the box that matters, only that there is a box, and you have taken the time to find it, and have placed it before someone with the earnest intention of sharing your love with them.
Title The Black Veins
Author Ashia Monet
Intended Target Audience Young Adult
Publication Date June 23rd 2019 by Ashia Monet
Find It On Goodreads ● Amazon ● Chapters ● The Book Depository ● Barnes & Noble ● IndieBound
In a world where magic thrives in secret city corners, a group of magicians embark on a road trip — and it’s the “no-love-interest”, found family adventure you’ve been searching for.
Sixteen-year-old Blythe is one of seven Guardians: magicians powerful enough to cause worldwide panic with a snap of their fingers. But Blythe spends her days pouring latte art at her family’s coffee shop, so why should she care about having apocalyptic abilities?
She’s given a reason when magician anarchists crash into said coffee shop and kidnap her family.
Heartbroken but determined, Blythe knows she can’t save them alone. A war is brewing between two magician governments and tensions are too high. So, she packs up her family’s bright yellow Volkswagen, puts on a playlist, and embarks on a road trip across the United States to enlist the help of six strangers whose abilities are unparalleled — the other Guardians.
